Elf | Christmas at the Movies Week 1 - Live Service Teaching

“Treat everyday like Christmas.” Inspiring words from Buddy the Elf. But what makes Christmas so special? Is it the gifts, cookies, or music? Today Brian Tome explores why time spent with family is what makes the movie Elf and Christmas so special and a classic.

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    - Hey, welcome to Crossroads.
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    My name is Andy Reider.
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    I'm the community pastor of Crossroads Anywhere.
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    Today we're going to be hearing from Brian Tome,
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    talking about one of his, and come on,
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    my favorite Christmas movies of all time, it is Elf.
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    But before we get there, there's two things
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    I want to fill you in on and let you know about.
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    The first, we're calling 100 tables.
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    Some of the best experiences
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    that I have had around church,
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    some of the best experiences that I've had
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    where I've grown the most
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    haven't happened in a church building.
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    They've happened around a table.
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    And we're starting 100 tables all over the country
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    in the hopes that more people can have
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    the experience of growing and connecting
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    around a table with, like, kind of a surrogate family.
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    We want that for you.
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    And we believe in this so deeply,
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    we're actually going to pay for the food.
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    So, if you want to be trained to,
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    not just join a community,
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    but to help build it right where you are,
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    go to Crossroads.net/anywhere,
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    and we'd love to invest in you and the community
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    that's going to grow up right around you.
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    Secondly, we believe that we're a church
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    that you can fully belong to
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    no matter where you live,
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    and that includes families,
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    that includes parents and kids connecting
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    and growing together.
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    And we have some really exciting resources
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    and content and experiences
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    that we want your help shaping.
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    So, we want you to join
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    our Kids and Families Crossroads Anywhere Pilot.
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    Again, you can join us there at Crossroads.net/anywhere.
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    All right, now we're here to jump in to Elf
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    and to what God has to speak to us through
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    Will Ferrell and Brian Tome. Here we go.
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    - [singing] Christmas at the movies.
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    It's perfect with some coffee.
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    Don't beat that ring a ling ding, ding, ding, talkin.
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    So, if we see the glow of a cellular telephone
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    will take them and will break them.
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    And we won't say we were mistaken.
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    You've been warned.
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    Merry Christmas. [breaking FX]
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    - Sorry, I can't ride with you the rest of the way up,
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    but this is where my dad works. Well --
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    Oh, I forgot to give you a hug.
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    - Oh, I don't know, Connie.
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    I've never declawed kittens before.
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    How many?
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    Eight?
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    I don't know if I'm going to have time.
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    Well, all right, just bring about the camp this week
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    and I'll see what I can do.
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    I'm not going to charge you.
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    Just bring them by and I'll see what I can do.
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    - Excuse me.
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    I'm here to see a Walter Hobbs. I'm Buddy the Elf.
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    - You look hilarious. Who sent you?
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    - Papa Elf.
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    - Papa Elf? - Um-hmm, from the North Pole.
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    - From the North Pole? - Yes.
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    - So, you really think we should ship 'em?
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    No. I think we should take a $30,000 bath
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    so some kid can understand what happened
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    to a puppy in a friggin pigeon. Ship 'em.
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    [phone rings] Yeah.
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    - Mr. Hobbs, it's me on the intercom.
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    - Right.
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    - Yeah. I think someone sent you a Christmas gram.
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    - Dad.
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    - All right. Let's get it over with.
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    - I walked all day and night to find you.
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    - You look like you came from the North Pole.
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    - That's exactly where I came from.
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    Santa must have called you.
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    - Oh, yeah, sure.
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    I just got off the cell phone with me.
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    - You did?
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    - So, go on.
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    - Go on with what?
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    - Are you going to sing a song or something,
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    or can I just go back to work?
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    - A song?
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    Yeah. Anything for you, Dad?
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    Um, [singing] I'm here with my dad, and we never met.
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    And he wants me to sing him a song.
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    And I was adopted, but you didn't know I was born.
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    So, I'm here now.
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    I found you, Daddy.
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    And guess what? I love you. I love you. I love you.
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    - Wow. That was weird.
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    Usually guys just, you know,
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    put my name into Jingle Bells or something.
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    - It's me, your son.
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    Susan Wells had me and she didn't tell you.
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    And -- and -- but now I'm here. It's me, buddy.
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    - Susan Wells? You said Susan Wells?
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    - Yes.
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    - Who sent this Christmas gram?
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    - What's a Christmas gram? I want one.
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    - I think we should call security.
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    - Good idea.
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    - I like to whisper, too.
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    It's okay. Walter's my father.
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    - Well, your dad's busy right now.
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    - Okay. I'll come back later.
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    Yeah. No, you're not going to come back for a while.
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    Okay? You're going to go back to Santaland.
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    - Okay.
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    - Yeah. Why don't you go back to Gimbels?
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    [cheers and applause]
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    - Merry Christmas, everybody.
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    Yes. Are we ready to have fun today?
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    Our staff gets together every day, our workday,
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    all of our staff for a half hour of communal prayer,
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    mandatory every day, generally 9-9:30,
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    groups of anywhere from from 10 to 30 people
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    will be sitting praying for you, and bunch of other things.
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    And this last week, one of those prayer meetings
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    came up that there's a pastor
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    in one of the communities we serve for another church
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    that said in a sermon just last week or so,
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    he said, "Church is not supposed to be fun.
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    And if you want to be fun, then go to Crossroads."
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    [laughter and cheers]
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    I said, "That's a great idea. That's a great idea."
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    So we're going to have fun today.
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    But I think you're also going to be a little surprised
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    that there is a deeper thing
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    that's happening in the movie Elf.
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    I don't think the writers intended it.
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    I don't think the producers understood it.
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    But Elf is what it is because it taps into
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    something deep inside of us.
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    And I'm going to try to tell you about that today.
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    So, let's pray.
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    God, I'm thankful for the ability to laugh
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    and to have fun and for the ability
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    to see things we haven't seen before,
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    to maybe feel something we haven't felt before
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    and maybe even come to know You
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    in a way we haven't known You before.
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    Help me to do Your bidding today, God.
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    I want to honor You and I want to help Your people.
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    I pray these things according to the character
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    and identity of Jesus. Amen.
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    Yes, I'm going to wear this all the time I preach,
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    except for this. This is hot.
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    I'm telling you what that is -- that is incredibly hot.
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    Now, we're going to look at that at Buddy the Elf.
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    If you haven't seen the movie Elf,
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    I'm going to ruin it for you today.
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    Actually, I'm not going to ruin for you.
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    You can still watch.
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    If you've never seen it,
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    you're going to get something out of it.
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    Buddy the Elf, here's the story.
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    We have a story of an elf who's not actually an elf.
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    He was born and then his mother dies.
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    He's placed in an orphanage.
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    Santa comes to the orphanage one day.
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    Buddy, little baby Buddy gets up out of bed.
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    He crawls in the Santa's gift bag,
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    and Santa goes back to the North Pole
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    and then opens up and there is this human being.
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    And now Buddy is raised with elves as an elf.
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    And as Buddy matures, he gets to a place where he says,
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    "I want to know who my family is.
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    I want to know who my dad is."
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    And this is the arc, the trajectory
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    of this movie known as The Elf.
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    It's actually a deeply spiritual movie,
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    even though people don't think that it is,
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    even though the writers and all those folks
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    didn't understand that it was,
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    it's actually incredibly deep.
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    And I think that's why it's becoming a Christmas classic,
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    if it's not already.
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    It came out in 2003, 19 years later, here it is,
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    it's still going strong.
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    It's because, I believe, apart from the great humor,
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    there's some deep spiritual undercurrents to it.
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    It taps into this desire we have for family,
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    this desire to want family.
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    Buddy wants family.
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    And all of us here, we want family.
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    We may not have the family that's a traditional family.
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    We may have redefined the family to fit our needs.
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    We may have a nontraditional family.
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    Whatever it looks like, everybody I know
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    wants family of some form or some shape.
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    And few of us have the family that we want,
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    and that causes the complication over Christmas.
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    The good part about Christmas is
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    that enables us to spend time with our families.
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    The bad news about Christmas is
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    it enables us to spend time with our families.
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    And yet this is something that we want.
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    One poll found that three out of four Americans
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    would be willing to get rid of
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    all their holiday traditions if we could
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    only have a meaningful family experience.
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    On Yahoo! it says this:
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    Despite respondents' desire
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    to spend the holidays with friends and family,
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    62% said they haven't done so in nearly two years.
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    So, we want family.
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    We think that's about Christmas.
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    But we're not spending time with family
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    sometimes because our family is just too painful.
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    It's just too difficult.
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    The good thing -- the good thing about Christmas
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    is Christmas is supposed to bring us a bit of joy,
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    a bit of happiness.
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    There's going to be some transferable principles
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    from Buddy's live to ours.
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    One I already talked about: all of us want family,
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    all of us want family.
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    The second one is when we take a look at Buddy,
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    we see that Buddy has a desire to bring joy.
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    - He's probably just reverting to
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    a state of childlike dependency.
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    - An elf?
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    - What he needs is to be nurtured.
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    - So, you'd like me to rescue them.
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    - Just bring them home.
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    Introduce him to Emily and Michael.
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    And once -- once he comes to terms with reality,
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    he should drop the whole elf thing
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    and move on with his life.
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    I mean, that's what I would do if I were you.
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    - Oh, my God, Walter, this is super for you.
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    You have another son.
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    - Wonderful.
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    Gosh, I guess I never really thought of it that way.
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    - This is incredible.
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    You know, it's a little complicated,
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    but it's nothing that we can't handle.
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    - Honey. - What?
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    - He thinks he's an elf. - I'm sorry. What?
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    - He thinks he's a Christmas elf.
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    - Oh, come on.
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    I'm sure he doesn't actually think he's an elf.
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    - And then I traveled to the seven levels
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    of the candy cane forest,
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    past the sea of swirly twirly gumdrops.
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    And then I walked through the Lincoln Tunnel.
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    - So where were you for the last 30 years?
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    - The North Pole.
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    - Can you pass the maple syrup, please?
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    - I didn't -- it's spaghetti.
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    - You know what? I think I have some. Oh, yes.
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    - You like sugar, huh?
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    - Is there sugar in syrup?
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    - Yes.
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    - Then yes.
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    We elves try to stick to the four main food groups:
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    Candy, candy canes, candy corns, and syrup.
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    - So, will you be staying with us then?
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    - You mean I can stay?
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    - Of course you can. - Emily.
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    - How long do you think you'll be with us?
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    - I hadn't really planned it out,
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    but I was thinking, like, forever.
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    - Emily, can I just speak to you
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    for a minute in the kitchen, please?
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    Are you crazy? He cannot stay here.
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    - Clearly, he has some serious issues.
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    We can't just throw him out in the snow.
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    - Why not? He loves the snow. He's told me 15 times.
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    - Walter, he's your son.
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    [belching loudly]
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    - Did you hear that?
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    - You are so weird.
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    - [laughs] Did you hear that?
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    Why is it -- Why is it that burps and farts are fun?
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    Why is that? They just are. They're incredibly.
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    You don't think so, brother? Come on.
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    You must go to another church that likes to have fun.
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    Come on. There you go. Now, I've got him smiling.
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    Thank you. I got a smile. There you go.
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    This is -- This is something that I think
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    God wires into us is the desire for fun,
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    the desire to laugh.
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    He gives us -- our bodies do things
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    that cause us to laugh.
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    It's kind of -- kind of funny.
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    And Buddy, he brings joy where he goes.
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    He finds things to have fun.
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    He does stuff like put syrup on spaghetti.
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    He answers phones and says,
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    "What's your favorite color?"
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    He goes down to the mailroom, he's demoted.
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    He goes down the lower level part of the skyscraper,
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    and he gets everybody dancing.
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    And he's doing a kind of a Russian jig, a Russian dance.
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    Wherever he goes, he brings joy.
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    This is part of our fixation for Christmas.
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    We want to have more joy at Christmas.
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    We have an opportunity to have connection
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    and to have laughter, even when normal people
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    would be bothered and depressed, Buddy again and again,
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    he shrugs it off and he comes back with a good attitude.
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    Now, we see that he definitely has feelings,
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    as James Caan, his father,
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    is denying him the connection that he wants,
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    denying that he is who he is.
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    As that's happening,
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    we see him definitely getting bummed,
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    but he snaps back and he looks for joy.
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    The Book of Psalms 97:11 says this:
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    Light is sown for the righteous,
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    and joy for the upright in heart.
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    So, who gets to have joy?
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    Those who are upright in heart.
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    If you don't want joy, then you're low in heart.
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    So, we should be, we -- I'm assuming
  • 00:15:09
    if you came to church, you're open to spiritual things.
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    You're open to Jesus.
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    We should be the happiest, most joyful, positive,
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    upbeat, seeing the bright side of anybody.
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    We should be. We're the people of hope.
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    We are the upright in heart.
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    Now, here's the problem, and this is where
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    the depth of Elf comes in.
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    The depth here and the problem is,
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    while we want to have joy, be up, we have a condition.
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    And the condition is known as the orphan heart.
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    This is Buddy's condition.
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    He has been at the North Pole.
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    He's been with elves, but he's felt abandoned.
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    He's felt like he doesn't know who he is,
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    that he doesn't have a family that he identifies.
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    And so he's in search of
  • 00:16:02
    because he feels like he's on the outs.
  • 00:16:04
    Friends, if you want to understand
  • 00:16:06
    the problems we have in our country,
  • 00:16:07
    this is the key to understanding
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    every problem in our country is that every person
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    in our country feels like an orphan.
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    Every person in our country
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    feels like they're on the outs.
  • 00:16:17
    Every person in our country
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    feels like I have to live hand to mouth.
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    Every person in our country feels alone,
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    abandoned, feels judged, feels not worthy,
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    feels their worth, feels our worth based on
  • 00:16:29
    how we do compare to somebody else.
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    And we need other people who are different than us
  • 00:16:34
    to make us feel better about ourselves.
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    Because that's the way orphans are.
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    It's the orphan heart.
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    The Bible actually talks about this.
  • 00:16:45
    The Bible actually tells us
  • 00:16:46
    that we are adopted into the family.
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    No one's actually born into the family of God physically.
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    There's nobody who's ever been born
  • 00:16:55
    and just naturally,
  • 00:16:56
    physically has a connection with God.
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    We later on get adopted into the family of God.
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    That's what the Bible teaches over and over again.
  • 00:17:03
    Buddy, his journey is a journey
  • 00:17:06
    that we can identify
  • 00:17:07
    with that puts us up to the heavens.
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    There's this -- there's this juxtaposition,
  • 00:17:14
    if you will, between joy and family.
  • 00:17:19
    There's this juxtaposition between happiness
  • 00:17:21
    in Buddy's life and pain.
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    - What should we put on it first?
  • 00:17:28
    - Lights. - Oh, good.
  • 00:17:29
    And then after that? Ornaments?
  • 00:17:34
    - What the hell is that?
  • 00:17:35
    - A Christmas tree.
  • 00:17:37
    - A Christmas tree?
  • 00:17:38
    - Buddy chopped it down in the park.
  • 00:17:42
    - Emily?
  • 00:17:43
    - I don't know what you're making such a big deal of it,
  • 00:17:46
    they were just having a little fun.
  • 00:17:48
    - Fun? So, felonies are fun?
  • 00:17:50
    I thought felonies were felonies.
  • 00:17:52
    - Okay, The tree thing was bad.
  • 00:17:54
    I'll get him to plant another one,
  • 00:17:55
    but at least Michael is happy for once.
  • 00:17:58
    - What? What's that supposed to mean?
  • 00:18:00
    - Well, I don't think it's any secret, Walter,
  • 00:18:03
    that you haven't exactly been there for him.
  • 00:18:05
    - Tell you what,
  • 00:18:06
    why don't we just pull him out of school
  • 00:18:08
    and let the deranged elf man raise him,
  • 00:18:10
    then they can have lots of fun committing felonies.
  • 00:18:13
    - How are we going to get the star on top?
  • 00:18:15
    - I got it.
  • 00:18:28
    - You feeling strong, my friend?
  • 00:18:29
    Call me Elf one more time.
  • 00:18:37
    - He's an angry elf.
  • 00:18:43
    - Look at you.
  • 00:18:47
    Ow.
  • 00:18:50
    I wasn't ready for that.
  • 00:18:52
    Hey, hey, hey. whoa!
  • 00:18:56
    - Call me elf one more time. Call me elf.
  • 00:19:00
    - You're an elf.
  • 00:19:08
    - Miles, I'm sorry.
  • 00:19:09
    He thinks he's an elf.
  • 00:19:12
    Listen, Miles. Listen, Miles.
  • 00:19:15
    - He must be a South Pole elf.
  • 00:19:20
    - You get the hell out of here.
  • 00:19:22
    - Where do you want me to go?
  • 00:19:23
    - I don't care where you go.
  • 00:19:25
    I don't care that you're an elf.
  • 00:19:26
    I don't care that you're nuts.
  • 00:19:27
    I don't care that you're my son.
  • 00:19:29
    Get out of my life, now.
  • 00:20:00
    - I don't belong anywhere.
  • 00:20:06
    - He's struggling with feeling rejected.
  • 00:20:09
    Many of us feel that way as well,
  • 00:20:11
    even if we're successful or maybe successful
  • 00:20:14
    because we're trying to prove to ourselves
  • 00:20:17
    that we're worthy and we're better than others.
  • 00:20:22
    We have a bunch of people in our church
  • 00:20:24
    who have adopted folks, taken kids in foster care.
  • 00:20:28
    It's a massive, massive problem.
  • 00:20:30
    And it's an amazing thing when someone takes in a child.
  • 00:20:33
    And very frequently that process is difficult
  • 00:20:39
    and painful because you have a child
  • 00:20:41
    who may be 11 years old, 10 years olds, 9 years old,
  • 00:20:44
    who their whole life all they've known is disconnection.
  • 00:20:47
    Their whole life, all they've known
  • 00:20:49
    has been relational disappointment.
  • 00:20:51
    And they can't trust.
  • 00:20:52
    They don't want to trust because they trust and they love,
  • 00:20:55
    and then they're let down again,
  • 00:20:56
    it hurts ten times worse than it was.
  • 00:21:00
    It's the orphan heart.
  • 00:21:01
    And this is the way many of us are.
  • 00:21:03
    Maybe we haven't been adopted physically.
  • 00:21:05
    Maybe we haven't been in foster care
  • 00:21:08
    or in an orphanage, but we feel disconnected.
  • 00:21:11
    We feel like we have to compete for our worth.
  • 00:21:13
    We feel like just in an orphanage,
  • 00:21:15
    there's only so much to go around,
  • 00:21:17
    so everyone should get fair-ies and evens.
  • 00:21:19
    And if somebody has more than I have
  • 00:21:21
    then I can get bitter.
  • 00:21:22
    If someone is doing the wrong thing,
  • 00:21:24
    we root for someone to get caught
  • 00:21:25
    because that's what the orphan wants.
  • 00:21:27
    If you go down, then I somehow go up.
  • 00:21:28
    I can criticize you and tear you down
  • 00:21:30
    because somehow that's going to make me be better
  • 00:21:32
    and have my chances more positive.
  • 00:21:34
    This is orphan tendencies in our culture.
  • 00:21:36
    We're just one huge, massive orphanage
  • 00:21:39
    with a bunch of people who feel detached and unloved
  • 00:21:43
    and needing accomplishment and affirmation
  • 00:21:46
    in order to have a moment, a brief moment of respite.
  • 00:21:50
    This is our spiritual condition.
  • 00:21:52
    This is our natural spiritual condition.
  • 00:21:54
    At least this is how the Bible puts it.
  • 00:21:55
    In the book of Ephesians chapter two it says this.
  • 00:21:58
    It says:
  • 00:22:17
    It says by nature we are distant from God,
  • 00:22:21
    by nature, not by nature of a nice, innocent baby
  • 00:22:25
    who God is impressed with.
  • 00:22:28
    No, by nature all of mankind is like an orphan,
  • 00:22:32
    separated, going their own way.
  • 00:22:35
    That's the way we are.
  • 00:22:36
    That's called original sin in the Bible.
  • 00:22:39
    It's what caused us to be as messed up emotionally
  • 00:22:42
    and spiritually as we are.
  • 00:22:43
    This natural propensity to look about ourselves
  • 00:22:47
    and be about ourselves
  • 00:22:48
    as every orphan is always about themselves
  • 00:22:51
    and only themselves.
  • 00:22:52
    And then Jesus puts it this way in John 1:12:
  • 00:22:55
    But to all who did receive him,
  • 00:22:58
    who believed in his name,
  • 00:22:59
    he gave the right to become children of God,
  • 00:23:04
    who are born,
  • 00:23:05
    not of blood nor of the will of the flesh
  • 00:23:07
    nor the will of man, but of God.
  • 00:23:10
    So, God gives us the right to become children of God.
  • 00:23:13
    We don't --I'm not a child of God just because I'm born.
  • 00:23:16
    I become a child of God
  • 00:23:19
    when God adopts me into his family.
  • 00:23:21
    Everyone's not a child of God.
  • 00:23:24
    Those who receive him and are adopted into his family,
  • 00:23:28
    they are, we are the children of God.
  • 00:23:31
    God loves all people.
  • 00:23:32
    God wants all people in his family,
  • 00:23:34
    but not all people want to be in his family.
  • 00:23:36
    Not all people want to receive him.
  • 00:23:37
    There's other verses I could share with you right now,
  • 00:23:40
    but I'm not going to do that.
  • 00:23:41
    I just want you know, this is the thrust
  • 00:23:44
    of the entire New Testament, of the entire Bible.
  • 00:23:47
    This is the thrust of your entire life,
  • 00:23:51
    figuring this out.
  • 00:23:53
    How will you feel secure and joyful and loved?
  • 00:23:57
    This is the thrust, really, of the movie Elf.
  • 00:24:02
    Buddy is happy as he is and as joyful as he is
  • 00:24:06
    and as great as his attitude is,
  • 00:24:08
    he keeps hitting this wall again and again
  • 00:24:11
    where he wants a father, he needs his father.
  • 00:24:14
    Even though his father, Papa Elf up in the North Pole,
  • 00:24:18
    even though he is a wonderful guy,
  • 00:24:20
    he wants to know his roots.
  • 00:24:22
    He wants his father.
  • 00:24:24
    Maybe the reason why I asked specifically
  • 00:24:27
    for this movie to preach on this weekend
  • 00:24:30
    is because when I saw the movie Elf,
  • 00:24:32
    I saw immediately that it was
  • 00:24:34
    a deep, spiritual, transcendent story.
  • 00:24:36
    When other people just saw syrup on noodles
  • 00:24:39
    and all kind of crazy stuff,
  • 00:24:42
    I saw the story of the Bible.
  • 00:24:44
    I saw the story of mankind.
  • 00:24:46
    I actually saw and I still see the story of me.
  • 00:24:50
    Can I tell you my story in just a little bit?
  • 00:24:52
    Some of you might have heard this,
  • 00:24:54
    maybe not all of this, but it fits in here.
  • 00:24:57
    So just bear with me. Here's my story.
  • 00:25:01
    I was born at a very early age. [laughter]
  • 00:25:07
    And then I was adopted.
  • 00:25:09
    I had a mother who had an unwanted pregnancy.
  • 00:25:13
    She was not knowing how she was gonna make that happen,
  • 00:25:16
    how to make me happen and raise me, so she --
  • 00:25:19
    and the father was not going to be around, apparently.
  • 00:25:22
    So, she put me up for adoption,
  • 00:25:24
    and I got adopted pretty much at birth.
  • 00:25:26
    And I'm very thankful I have.
  • 00:25:28
    I have great parents.
  • 00:25:29
    My parents have blessed me greatly.
  • 00:25:30
    They've done things like give me a stable home,
  • 00:25:33
    never hungry,
  • 00:25:35
    saved money for me to have a college education.
  • 00:25:37
    All of these things.
  • 00:25:38
    They even paid for my seminary.
  • 00:25:40
    Really, really, really great people, really are.
  • 00:25:43
    And I dealt with the orphaned heart
  • 00:25:47
    in a significant way growing up.
  • 00:25:49
    I think because, like Buddy, Buddy looked at Papa Elf
  • 00:25:52
    and as good as he was, he knew you're not my dad.
  • 00:25:57
    And as good as my dad may have been,
  • 00:25:58
    I was reminded all the time,
  • 00:26:00
    "You're not my dad because you're not like me."
  • 00:26:02
    I'm taller. My dad is shorter.
  • 00:26:04
    My dad has a huge head. I've got a small head.
  • 00:26:07
    He has a huge head because he has a huge, smart brain.
  • 00:26:10
    I have a small head because I have a small brain
  • 00:26:12
    that isn't very smart sometimes.
  • 00:26:14
    My dad went to Ivy League schools
  • 00:26:16
    and got valedictorian
  • 00:26:17
    and is a nuclear scientist,
  • 00:26:20
    actually troubleshooting nuclear reactors.
  • 00:26:23
    And then there's me
  • 00:26:26
    who takes seven years to get a four year degree
  • 00:26:28
    and takes accounting 1 three times.
  • 00:26:33
    Fourth grade, one of my more traumatic memories.
  • 00:26:35
    I'm learning -- we're learning how to do long division,
  • 00:26:38
    and I'm not getting it.
  • 00:26:39
    It's not coming natural to me.
  • 00:26:40
    My dad's trying to coach me.
  • 00:26:41
    And we're at the kitchen table,
  • 00:26:43
    and he is looking over my shoulder trying to explain it
  • 00:26:46
    and I'm getting it wrong again.
  • 00:26:47
    And he takes his pencil,
  • 00:26:48
    I can remember as clear as day, it said Westinghouse on it,
  • 00:26:51
    and he takes it -- that's where he worked.
  • 00:26:53
    He jams his pencil into the paper, said,
  • 00:26:55
    "Why can't you get this?" And the pencil breaks.
  • 00:26:59
    I could see the tip break off and I just start weeping.
  • 00:27:01
    I can remember tears falling off my face,
  • 00:27:04
    hitting the -- hitting the thing
  • 00:27:06
    while I saw that broken tip of the number 2 pencil.
  • 00:27:09
    Because "Who am I? I am not my dad. He is not me.
  • 00:27:14
    I am a very alone. No one understands me."
  • 00:27:18
    This would be reinforced throughout my life
  • 00:27:20
    in different ways and stupid ways.
  • 00:27:22
    I did stupid, stupid things, just like as a 15 year old.
  • 00:27:25
    I've always liked tobacco in all forms.
  • 00:27:28
    And when I was 15 it was awesome
  • 00:27:31
    that you could go into any store
  • 00:27:33
    and buy anything you want. God bless America.
  • 00:27:35
    You'd come out with cigars, chew, whatever you want.
  • 00:27:38
    It was wonderful.
  • 00:27:39
    So I thought -- I thought I should get my dad,
  • 00:27:42
    for I think it was Father's Day,
  • 00:27:44
    "I should get him a big cigar, that'd be awesome."
  • 00:27:47
    It's a stupid idea, dumb idea.
  • 00:27:49
    I never saw my dad have any tobacco, ever,
  • 00:27:52
    never his whole life.
  • 00:27:53
    In my heart, my juvenile heart I thought,
  • 00:27:55
    "Yeah, my dad will see that I love him.
  • 00:27:57
    He'll see, it'll be great. He'll appreciate it.
  • 00:27:59
    Maybe no one's ever given him a big, nice cigar."
  • 00:28:01
    It wasn't a nice cigar. It was pretty cheap. It was big.
  • 00:28:04
    Gave it to him, and he put it on his bureau.
  • 00:28:08
    And I saw it day after day, week after week,
  • 00:28:11
    month after month, year after year
  • 00:28:13
    not get used, get dryer and dryer.
  • 00:28:15
    And every time I saw that,
  • 00:28:16
    I was reminded my dad's not like me.
  • 00:28:20
    My dad doesn't get me.
  • 00:28:22
    My life would be so much better
  • 00:28:25
    and so much more fulfilling
  • 00:28:27
    if I actually knew my biological father,
  • 00:28:29
    because then things would make sense
  • 00:28:31
    and all that stuff.
  • 00:28:33
    That's basically Buddy's story.
  • 00:28:35
    So, I would always try to find my parents,
  • 00:28:37
    but eventually I just -- I couldn't do it.
  • 00:28:39
    I just gave up
  • 00:28:40
    and I just kind of lost interest eventually.
  • 00:28:42
    A woman here a Crossroads Susan Levy,
  • 00:28:45
    contacted me and said, "Hey, I kind of do this.
  • 00:28:48
    I'd just like to take your case on.
  • 00:28:50
    So, tell me what you want, tell me what you know,
  • 00:28:52
    and I'm going to go see if I can find your dad."
  • 00:28:54
    I was like, "Okay, fine.
  • 00:28:56
    You want to do that, fine. No problem."
  • 00:28:58
    She comes back and she says,
  • 00:29:00
    "Hey, I think I found your birth mother."
  • 00:29:02
    And I get together with my birth mom.
  • 00:29:05
    And it was really amazing.
  • 00:29:07
    She was -- she was a believer.
  • 00:29:08
    She was a Christian.
  • 00:29:09
    She had been praying for me every day, every day.
  • 00:29:12
    And my wife always said, "You know,
  • 00:29:16
    someone has to be praying for you every day
  • 00:29:18
    because doesn't make sense
  • 00:29:19
    for you to be as blessed as you are."
  • 00:29:21
    [laughter]
  • 00:29:25
    Perhaps my birth mother.
  • 00:29:27
    And I -- question number one from me for her was who --
  • 00:29:31
    tell me about my father.
  • 00:29:32
    I don't know if this is the way it is
  • 00:29:34
    like this for women.
  • 00:29:35
    I'm not a woman. I don't identify as a woman.
  • 00:29:38
    I'm not a woman.
  • 00:29:39
    So, I don't know if it's the way it is for women.
  • 00:29:41
    But I can tell you, for men,
  • 00:29:42
    men have a need to understand and know their father.
  • 00:29:45
    And they actually,
  • 00:29:46
    we actually want the blessing of our father.
  • 00:29:48
    Very few of us ever get the blessing of the father.
  • 00:29:50
    So, we're doomed, unless we figure out a different way,
  • 00:29:53
    we're doomed to be a spiritual orphan
  • 00:29:55
    for the rest of our life.
  • 00:29:56
    Having a hard time making commitments,
  • 00:29:58
    having a hard time being happy,
  • 00:29:59
    having a hard time dealing with rejection,
  • 00:30:01
    having a hard time giving love and feeling love,
  • 00:30:03
    having a hard time -- it's we're doomed to that.
  • 00:30:06
    Without the father's blessing, that's what we're in for.
  • 00:30:08
    Boy, I'd like to have another sermon right now,
  • 00:30:10
    but I don't have time for it.
  • 00:30:12
    But that was really what I was looking for.
  • 00:30:14
    She said, "I don't know anything.
  • 00:30:16
    I don't know where he is, sorry."
  • 00:30:21
    Just as my mother drew a boundary,
  • 00:30:23
    an appropriate boundary around me 50 some years ago,
  • 00:30:26
    because she couldn't care for me and keep me,
  • 00:30:28
    I realize I need to draw a boundary around her
  • 00:30:31
    at this point because I just had too much going on.
  • 00:30:34
    I had too many family commitments already,
  • 00:30:35
    too many staff relationships, too many --
  • 00:30:37
    And I just -- it was a lot of stuff going on.
  • 00:30:39
    I just said to her very, very nicely,
  • 00:30:41
    "I love you. I'm thankful for you.
  • 00:30:43
    But we're not going to have an ongoing relationship."
  • 00:30:45
    And she she had a hard time accepting that,
  • 00:30:47
    understandably.
  • 00:30:48
    And she kept trying to like open the door
  • 00:30:51
    and spend time with me.
  • 00:30:52
    And finally, I just ended up ignoring phone calls.
  • 00:30:55
    She left me a voicemail once, she said,
  • 00:30:58
    "Brian, good news. I just talked to your father."
  • 00:31:03
    I'm going like, "I should just end this.
  • 00:31:05
    She said she had no idea.
  • 00:31:07
    I'm not going to call her back.
  • 00:31:08
    I'm not. I'm not not falling for this."
  • 00:31:11
    Some time later, I'm driving on my summer break
  • 00:31:13
    down to where we're going to spend time
  • 00:31:15
    at Norse Lake in Tennessee and phone rings.
  • 00:31:19
    Like, "Huh?" I answer, "Hello?"
  • 00:31:21
    And this guy says, "Hi, Brian.
  • 00:31:24
    Susan tells me that I may be your father."
  • 00:31:28
    I'm like, "Okay."
  • 00:31:32
    He says, "Here's what I'd like to do.
  • 00:31:33
    I'd like to -- I'd like to get a DNA test.
  • 00:31:38
    We'll check your DNA against my DNA.
  • 00:31:40
    If it comes back that you're my son,
  • 00:31:42
    then I'll get together with you
  • 00:31:43
    and tell you anything you want to know."
  • 00:31:45
    And I'm sitting there, I'm thinking, I'm driving, right.
  • 00:31:47
    I'm going, I thought and I said,
  • 00:31:49
    "Well, who says that I want to get together with yo
  • 00:31:53
    u and that I even want to take the test at all?"
  • 00:31:57
    And there's a pause on another line.
  • 00:31:58
    And then he goes, "That's exactly what I say.
  • 00:32:02
    You must be my son."
  • 00:32:03
    [laughter]
  • 00:32:08
    He said, "That's exactly what I would say.
  • 00:32:11
    You must be my son."
  • 00:32:13
    I was like, [sobbing]
  • 00:32:15
    Like, "Oh, my gosh. Like someone understands me?
  • 00:32:19
    Someone gets me? Oh, my word. Woo!"
  • 00:32:24
    He says, "Hey, let's go -- How about if I come out
  • 00:32:26
    and visit you for the weekend?"
  • 00:32:27
    I said, "No, I've already been to that train one time.
  • 00:32:30
    That's too big of a commitment.
  • 00:32:31
    Maybe at some point we'll do --
  • 00:32:33
    Let's hold on. Let's talk on the phone.
  • 00:32:35
    But I'll get together with you sometime in the future.
  • 00:32:37
    Let's have a beer or something like that."
  • 00:32:39
    He said, "Okay, fine." So he lives in California.
  • 00:32:41
    I went out to California for a conference.
  • 00:32:43
    I stopped and I said,
  • 00:32:44
    "Hey, I'm gonna be here on this date.
  • 00:32:45
    Want to get together for a beer?"
  • 00:32:47
    He said, "Sure, Great."
  • 00:32:48
    So we're going out.
  • 00:32:49
    We come together and we have a beer.
  • 00:32:50
    The first time I've had a beer with a father figure.
  • 00:32:52
    My dad doesn't drink at all, but my birth father does.
  • 00:32:55
    So I'm thinking like, "Oh my gosh, this is amazing.
  • 00:32:58
    He understands my directness.
  • 00:32:59
    He's just as direct as me."
  • 00:33:01
    And then everything went downhill from there.
  • 00:33:03
    Everything went down.
  • 00:33:04
    He starts telling me that he's got --
  • 00:33:07
    I've got two half sisters.
  • 00:33:08
    He got two daughters who he says, quote unquote,
  • 00:33:11
    "Live back east somewhere."
  • 00:33:14
    Doesn't know where they live.
  • 00:33:16
    Doesn't know where they are.
  • 00:33:19
    He divorced their mom
  • 00:33:21
    because she went into menopause
  • 00:33:24
    and he said, quote unquote,
  • 00:33:26
    "I just couldn't handle that crap."
  • 00:33:27
    So he divorced his wife because she went into menopause.
  • 00:33:30
    Too tough for him.
  • 00:33:31
    Had another wife, divorced her.
  • 00:33:33
    He said, "Now I'm on my third.
  • 00:33:34
    She's a Filipino in her thirties."
  • 00:33:36
    And he said, "She can't keep up with me."
  • 00:33:39
    And he's just kind of going on in this stuff.
  • 00:33:41
    And I'm like, "Okay, I think I've had enough.
  • 00:33:44
    I think I'm good. I think I'm done."
  • 00:33:45
    So we end, everything is nice.
  • 00:33:47
    And I start having this crisis like,
  • 00:33:49
    "Oh my gosh, my -- my dad has got this big head
  • 00:33:53
    and he's hyper smart
  • 00:33:55
    and he doesn't like my vices at all.
  • 00:33:58
    I'm not like him.
  • 00:33:59
    And this guy over here,
  • 00:34:00
    he -- he doesn't even talk to his daughters,
  • 00:34:04
    doesn't even know where they live.
  • 00:34:05
    I like my daughters. They actually like me.
  • 00:34:08
    We laugh together.
  • 00:34:10
    My son, we hang out just to have fun.
  • 00:34:13
    How does he not do that?
  • 00:34:15
    Oh, my gosh. He's on -- he's on his third wife.
  • 00:34:17
    I'm a one woman kind of man. One woman.
  • 00:34:20
    One woman -- plan to be one.
  • 00:34:22
    I'm a one woman kind of man. Who am I?"
  • 00:34:24
    I'm looking at this stuff, and it was really a crisis.
  • 00:34:26
    And then as I was depressed because I always thought
  • 00:34:29
    if I saw somebody who was my DNA,
  • 00:34:32
    kind of like what Buddy thinks, if he sees James Caan,
  • 00:34:35
    everything's gonna make sense.
  • 00:34:36
    I kept thinking everything would makes sense,
  • 00:34:38
    and it wasn't, it was more confusing.
  • 00:34:40
    I kept asking myself, "Now who am I?"
  • 00:34:42
    So, praying about this.
  • 00:34:44
    The next morning I get up and pray about it.
  • 00:34:45
    And God says to me, I sense God say,
  • 00:34:47
    "Brian, you're my son. You're my son.
  • 00:34:52
    You're not his son or his son.
  • 00:34:53
    And I get you. And I get you."
  • 00:34:58
    God understands me and he likes me
  • 00:35:03
    and he even laughs at my jokes, believe it or not.
  • 00:35:06
    And he gets you. He understands you.
  • 00:35:10
    And he laughs at your jokes.
  • 00:35:12
    I don't care what your giftedness is.
  • 00:35:13
    I don't care what your talents are.
  • 00:35:15
    I don't care what your wiring is.
  • 00:35:17
    I don't care if you're a jock, nerd, whatever you are,
  • 00:35:21
    white, black, I don't care if you're left, right.
  • 00:35:24
    I don't care if you're artsy, grungy. I don't care.
  • 00:35:27
    God understands you. He gets you.
  • 00:35:30
    He loves you. He gets a kick out of you.
  • 00:35:34
    But we often don't feel this because
  • 00:35:37
    we're dealing with our orphaned hearted tendencies,
  • 00:35:42
    this thing that keeps me from connecting with God.
  • 00:35:46
    And God so desperately wants to connect with you.
  • 00:35:49
    He so wants to sit with you.
  • 00:35:51
    He so wants you to sit with him.
  • 00:35:53
    This is actually a transcendent thing.
  • 00:35:57
    This is the other thing that we see
  • 00:35:59
    in the movie The Elf, is we see --
  • 00:36:02
    when you see a desire for the transcendent
  • 00:36:05
    at the climactic scene, which fascinatingly enough,
  • 00:36:08
    this next scene I'm going to show you,
  • 00:36:10
    Lib and I, my first time ever in New York City
  • 00:36:12
    was when she was having her 40th birthday.
  • 00:36:15
    And she wanted to go there, and I surprised her with that.
  • 00:36:17
    I'd never been in New York City before,
  • 00:36:19
    so we surprised her for a 40th birthday trip.
  • 00:36:21
    And while we're there and staying at this hotel
  • 00:36:24
    and out walking one night, they were filming
  • 00:36:27
    this very scene from the Elf
  • 00:36:29
    while we were there that night,
  • 00:36:32
    not knowing to me that this is actually going to be
  • 00:36:35
    a critical actual movie for me, believe it or not,
  • 00:36:38
    in my spiritual formation.
  • 00:36:40
    This ultimate scene, this climactic scene
  • 00:36:43
    is what I'm going to show you next.
  • 00:36:44
    It's where Santa is trying to get his sleigh
  • 00:36:50
    up and going, but he can't because
  • 00:36:52
    there's not enough natural belief anymore.
  • 00:36:54
    There's not Christmas spirit.
  • 00:36:55
    So he's got to use artificial means because
  • 00:36:57
    it used to be people believed and had faith in Christmas
  • 00:37:00
    and they don't any longer.
  • 00:37:01
    But if only they would, they could take off again.
  • 00:37:04
    And there's this really cool, cool thing
  • 00:37:06
    where we see this desire
  • 00:37:08
    for the transcendent with Buddy.
  • 00:37:10
    The transcendent is what Christmas is about.
  • 00:37:12
    And the transcendent this scene is what Buddy is about.
  • 00:37:17
    - Excuse me.
  • 00:37:18
    -The authorities have not discovered
  • 00:37:20
    any reindeer in the park?
  • 00:37:21
    - No, No reindeer.
  • 00:37:22
    - Sleigh bells? - No sleigh bells either.
  • 00:37:24
    - Elves? - None of that.
  • 00:37:26
    We just need everyone --
  • 00:37:27
    - It's the real Santa.
  • 00:37:28
    His sleigh won't, nobody believes in it.
  • 00:37:30
    - Did you see something in the park?
  • 00:37:31
    - Everyone out there, Santa needs us to believe.
  • 00:37:33
    I can prove he's real. Look, this is his list.
  • 00:37:36
    - Okay, well, further confirmation
  • 00:37:38
    that there has been a Santa sighting tonight.
  • 00:37:40
    We have the naughty and nice list.
  • 00:37:42
    Lynn Kessler wants a Powerpuff Girls playset.
  • 00:37:44
    [gasps]
  • 00:37:45
    Mark Weber wants an electric guitar?
  • 00:37:46
    Yes.
  • 00:37:47
    - Carolyn Reynolds wants the Suzy-Talks-a-Lot.
  • 00:37:50
    - Thanks, Buddy.
  • 00:37:52
    - Dirk Lawson wants a day of pampering
  • 00:37:53
    at Burke Williams Spa.
  • 00:37:55
    - Must be another Dirk Lawson.
  • 00:38:01
    - Dave Keckler wants some Nike shocks.
  • 00:38:03
    - Okay, well, obviously,
  • 00:38:05
    we have a new development in the story.
  • 00:38:07
    Confirmation that Santa must have been sighted
  • 00:38:10
    because we have his book right here.
  • 00:38:12
    - What's your name?
  • 00:38:13
    - I'm Charlotte Dennon, New York One.
  • 00:38:17
    - D. Charlotte Dennon wants a Tiffany engagement ring
  • 00:38:22
    and for her boyfriend to stop dragging his feet
  • 00:38:24
    and commit already.
  • 00:38:25
    - Oh.
  • 00:38:30
    - We've got power.
  • 00:38:31
    - Charlotte? Charlotte?
  • 00:38:34
    - Hey, turn the cameras back on.
  • 00:38:36
    - Who told you to say that? - The real Santa.
  • 00:38:38
    We need to get these cameras back on.
  • 00:38:39
    He needs our help.
  • 00:38:41
    - But some spontaneous Christmas caroling
  • 00:38:43
    has broken out right here in front of Central Park.
  • 00:38:45
    Let's have a listen in.
  • 00:38:46
    [singing Santa Claus is Coming to Town]
  • 00:39:13
    - Just a little more.
  • 00:39:27
    - You're not singing.
  • 00:39:29
    - Yes, I am.
  • 00:39:31
    - No, you're not. You're just moving your lips.
  • 00:39:33
    - Santa!
  • 00:39:36
    - Michael, please. What's the big deal?
  • 00:39:37
    - Dad?
  • 00:39:40
    - [singing] Santa Claus is coming to town.
  • 00:40:05
    - Goodbye.
  • 00:40:07
    - Not like the old days.
  • 00:40:08
    - Charlotte?
  • 00:40:10
    - Man, anyone admit just like a little tear
  • 00:40:13
    in the corner of your eye maybe?
  • 00:40:14
    Yeah, right, Russ?
  • 00:40:17
    I mean, don't you want Santa to be real?
  • 00:40:20
    I mean, don't you?
  • 00:40:22
    Every time I see a Christmas movie is like I want that.
  • 00:40:24
    I wish there was a fat guy who gave gifts
  • 00:40:28
    and reindeer pulled his sleigh.
  • 00:40:30
    I want that. Most of us do.
  • 00:40:32
    We think, "Oh, that would be so great."
  • 00:40:35
    And it's because baked into all of us
  • 00:40:38
    is the desire for the transcendent.
  • 00:40:41
    Baked into all of us is a belief and a yearning
  • 00:40:45
    for the miraculous, a belief and a little yearning
  • 00:40:48
    for something above us, beyond us,
  • 00:40:52
    greater than us that reaches down to us
  • 00:40:55
    in a way that Santa did.
  • 00:40:56
    And it's true, it's just that his name is Jesus.
  • 00:41:00
    His name is Jesus and he is the very son of God,
  • 00:41:06
    in the family of God, who reaches down to us.
  • 00:41:09
    This is the story of Christmas.
  • 00:41:11
    Let me read it for you as we close today.
  • 00:41:13
    It comes the book of Matthew, and here's what it says:
  • 00:42:19
    Jesus dealt with what it was like to be an orphan.
  • 00:42:25
    One of the biggest criticisms that was against him
  • 00:42:27
    and they used to dig at him all the time
  • 00:42:29
    is they would -- they were in essence
  • 00:42:31
    the religious ruling leaders
  • 00:42:32
    would call him a bastard to his face.
  • 00:42:35
    They would tell him, "We don't know who your dad is.
  • 00:42:37
    Oh, yeah, right. We heard this Holy Spirit one.
  • 00:42:39
    Yeah, Yeah."
  • 00:42:42
    He felt what it was like to be rejected
  • 00:42:46
    and to not have a family that was up to snuff,
  • 00:42:49
    up to standards with everybody else's
  • 00:42:51
    or what they thought it should be.
  • 00:42:55
    He had a miracle that is beyond Santa
  • 00:42:58
    and a flying fat white guy in a sleigh.
  • 00:43:01
    He actually got born
  • 00:43:03
    when there was never any sex that happened with his mom.
  • 00:43:06
    Why is that?
  • 00:43:07
    It's because that gave him the ability
  • 00:43:10
    to have a life that he lived sinless,
  • 00:43:12
    so that when he goes to a cross
  • 00:43:14
    and he dies on the cross, he can die for me,
  • 00:43:16
    not die for his own stuff.
  • 00:43:17
    Therefore I don't have to get punished for my own stuff.
  • 00:43:19
    My father adopts me as an orphan kid
  • 00:43:23
    who's got all kind of issues into his family,
  • 00:43:25
    and I don't have to pay for all my thievery.
  • 00:43:27
    I don't have to pay for all my five finger discounts,
  • 00:43:31
    because Jesus has for me.
  • 00:43:33
    I know this sounds crazy.
  • 00:43:34
    Of course it sounds crazy.
  • 00:43:36
    And we should expect if there is a God
  • 00:43:39
    and he comes to us, we should expect crazy.
  • 00:43:41
    In fact, if there's not a God
  • 00:43:42
    that supersedes the natural every once in a while,
  • 00:43:44
    it's called supernatural,
  • 00:43:46
    then we shouldn't believe in God at all.
  • 00:43:48
    Let's just believe in the times table,
  • 00:43:51
    and my dad will help you out with that really, really well.
  • 00:43:54
    And you can get everything the times table gives you
  • 00:43:56
    and nothing that's an X factor
  • 00:43:58
    that you'd acquire from the power of God.
  • 00:44:00
    This is the story of Christmas, except it happened,
  • 00:44:03
    it really, really happened.
  • 00:44:06
    And 2000 years of history and change,
  • 00:44:08
    cultures and eyewitnesses say that it is,
  • 00:44:12
    that he's come to be with us
  • 00:44:15
    and he wants to be with you.
  • 00:44:18
    Maybe you've been an orphan.
  • 00:44:20
    Maybe you felt like an orphan
  • 00:44:22
    and you want to come into his family right now.
  • 00:44:25
    If so, you just pray a prayer like this.
  • 00:44:27
    Just repeat this after me.
  • 00:44:29
    God, I want to be in your family.
  • 00:44:33
    And I ask that you forgive me for my sin.
  • 00:44:36
    That's all right. You say it. Say it.
  • 00:44:39
    And I asked you come into my life right now.
  • 00:44:43
    And I asked you, fill me with your Holy Spirit.
  • 00:44:47
    I give you my life right now.
  • 00:44:51
    In Jesus name, I pray. Amen.
  • 00:44:54
    And God, I pray for anyone who said that prayer
  • 00:44:57
    and anybody who needed be reminded of
  • 00:44:59
    the time we said that prayer
  • 00:45:00
    when we came into your family.
  • 00:45:02
    God, we want to shake off, shake off the old person
  • 00:45:05
    that's having an orphan mentality,
  • 00:45:08
    just is too cynical, too fearful,
  • 00:45:12
    too unexpecting of your love and grace.
  • 00:45:16
    We are your children and we want to claim that identity
  • 00:45:20
    and walk in that this Christmas season.
  • 00:45:22
    You're good to adopt us and love us.
  • 00:45:25
    And I pray these things in your name, Jesus. Amen.
  • 00:45:30
    - Well, hey, thank you so much for joining us.
  • 00:45:32
    And I hope you enjoyed Brian's message.
  • 00:45:34
    But I want to make something really clear.
  • 00:45:36
    I say it a lot, but as much as we hope
  • 00:45:38
    you enjoyed what you just watched,
  • 00:45:40
    we are community and not content.
  • 00:45:42
    We're a church that you can belong to.
  • 00:45:44
    And if there's anything that I or Crossroads can do
  • 00:45:47
    to just encourage you, to nudge you along
  • 00:45:50
    in your journey with God, hey, just send me an email.
  • 00:45:53
    It's that simple.
  • 00:45:54
    It's not a chat bot, it's not a team.
  • 00:45:55
    It's just my email Andy.Reider@crossroads.net.
  • 00:45:59
    If there's anything I can do, or be praying for you about,
  • 00:46:01
    I would love, love, love to do that.
  • 00:46:03
    Secondly, just know the holidays,
  • 00:46:06
    while they're a really joyful time in lots of ways,
  • 00:46:08
    they can also be just a really lonely time.
  • 00:46:11
    They can be a really, really challenging time.
  • 00:46:14
    We've got some amazing resources we've put together
  • 00:46:16
    that can help the holidays, man, be a time
  • 00:46:19
    where you grow and are encouraged.
  • 00:46:21
    You can check those out at crossroads.net/care.
  • 00:46:24
    We'd love to just do anything we can
  • 00:46:26
    to encourage you and help you heal
  • 00:46:29
    and grow this holiday.
  • 00:46:30
    Lastly, we do all this stuff
  • 00:46:32
    not because it's convenient, not because it's easy,
  • 00:46:35
    but because it is worth it.
  • 00:46:37
    And we just know that when we trust God,
  • 00:46:39
    yes, with our time, with our talents and with our money,
  • 00:46:43
    with our resources, God can do more with it than we can.
  • 00:46:46
    That's why my wife and I, Rachel,
  • 00:46:48
    why we choose to give to Crossroads
  • 00:46:50
    and why we'd love to have you consider
  • 00:46:52
    joining us in that.
  • 00:46:54
    If you want more info on where our money goes
  • 00:46:56
    and how we spend it, head to crossroads.net/give.
  • 00:47:00
    Hey, next week we're going to be hearing again
  • 00:47:02
    from Brian on a Christmas classic.
  • 00:47:04
    We hope to see you then.

Process, journal or discuss the themes of this article - here's a few questions to get the ball rolling...

Welcome to the Weekend-Follow Up This is the group part of the Bible Challenge, so your questions are based on specific Bible passages from the weekend message. Each week, your group will discover what God might be saying to you, and how you can respond through a group discussion.

  1. What’s the best Christmas movie ever made and why?

  2. What stood out to you most from this week’s message?

  3. “Family” sometimes is a loaded word. What does family mean to you?

  4. Do you ever find yourself struggling with feeling alone, rejected, like everyone’s out to get you, etc.? How does it play out in your life?

  5. Where might God be prompting you to choose membership in God’s family over your own wants?

  6. How can you share the love you experience as a part of God’s family with others this week?

  7. Let’s end with prayer. You can say something like, “Jesus, thank you for inviting us into your family. Thank you for accepting us even with all of our flaws. Please let us overflow with the joy that comes with your love and spread the good news with the people around us. Amen.”

More from the Weekend

Bonus Questions! Check these out if you’re on a roll and want to go a little deeper.

  • How do you respond to brokenness or conflict in your relationships?
  • How do you feel when you experience rejection? How does that influence how you live your life?

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(This stuff helps us figure out how many fruitcakes to make come December)

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Got it! Enjoy your discussion.


Dec 4, 2022

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